In the past few months, A Minecraft Movie has been a relative success. While probably not a good film in any serious sense of the word, fans of the saga have been more or less delighted, since it was for more than a decade players that had wished to see their beloved game transposed into a movie. It's also had its fair share of controversies, but this post is not for those; they are too common and well-known for me.

With the time of projection in theaters now over for this film, and it already being available on digital streaming platforms, those who are not terminally online could have missed an obscure but funny detail about this absolute masterpiece: an "alternative" version of the movie that, some days before the official release, has made its way onto piracy websites and social media... the now-called "TEMU" bootleg version.

Basically, this is what appears to be an unfinished, unpolished version of the movie from early on in development. While it shows that the motion picture hasn't gone trough major changes in the cutting room floor, with only some minor scenes actually being changed or removed in the final release, the CGI in this leaked version is entirely unrendered, and constructed with many placeholder or untextured objects. Fun fact: some say actually ended up on the Internet only after it somehow got shown in theaters in America... which seems a crazy story to me, but it's the only reasonable explanation for why the video and audio seem like a camrip: they probably are.

While I would now love to elaborate on the quirks of this one-of-a-time pirated version of the Minecraft movie, I sadly have a confession to make: I haven't watched it yet. Crazy, I know, but I never ended up going to see it at the cinema (mostly because it didn't really convince me, and I don't think I can be blamed for this), and obviously I wouldn't seriously want to watch the bootleg. However, I did save it when I ended up randomly getting a link for it from social media, because I knew how hard it would have become to get this cursed file after a while; case in point, before writing this post I quickly searched for a genuine pirated version of the film (I don't have Prime Video, lmao), and found it immediately... which means I didn't find the fake one.

Now, please, don't despair! While I will should probably find myself an evening to get back to this incredible work I left aside, so that I can maybe write a proper article about all the things wrong with it (both the unsanctioned and the original version, and I feel like there's a lot to write) or extend this one, I'm just so kind that I will leave the hexed release here, in this MEGA embed below. Have fun watching this hour-and-a-half pile of blurry smudged pixels, then; it's probably still much better than a lot of comedy movies created and distributed in the crappy country I live in!